LACKING.TXT

 

  POLITICALLY CORRECT WAYS TO SAY SOMEONE IS A FEW

  BRICKS SHORT OF A LOAD

 

*  A few clowns short of a circus.

*  A few fries short of a happy meal.

*  The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.

*  All foam, no beer.

*  The butter has slipped off his pancake.

*  The cheese slid off his cracker.

*  Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.

*  Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.

*  Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

*  He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.

*  As smart as bait.

*  Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.

*  Her sewing machine's out of thread.

*  One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.

*  His belt doesn't go through all the loops.

*  Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.

*  Not wired to code.

*  Skylight leaks a little.

*  Her slinky's kinked.

*  Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together.

*  A photographic memory, but the lens cover is on.

*  During evolution his ancestors were in the control group.

*  Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

*  so dense, light bends around her.

*  If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.

*  Standing close to her, you can hear the ocean.

*  Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled.

*  stayed on the Tilt-A-Whirl a bit too long.

   an experiment in artificial stupidity.

   dumber than a box of hair.

   a few peas short of a casserole.

   doesn't have all her Corn Flakes in one box.

   one taco short of a combination plate.

   a few feathers short of a whole duck.

   all foam...no coke.

   an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt.

   couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

   fell out of the Stupid Tree and hit every branch on the way down.

   intellect is rivaled only by garden tools.

   elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.

   forgot to pay his brain bill.

   antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.

   If she had another brain, it would be lonely.

   missing a few buttons on his remote control.

   no grain in his silo.

   His receiver is off the hook.

   Too much yardage between the goal posts.

 

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